When I look around at the people whose lives I pass every day, I notice that many of them are acting. And if I had to guess, I'd have to say that you have also become pretty good at acting. I think we all have. We've all become pretty great at "having it all together" on the outside, when inside we're anything but OK. After all, everyone around us is smiling so we better smile too, right? Everyone around us lives incredible lives, or so Instagram shows us, right? The others aren't standing up and admitting they're not OK, so why should we? So I'll go first. Do you mind if I whisper just a little bit? You see, this week has been just a little bit more difficult than I first thought it would be. This week resembles the loss of my dream, the pain of loneliness, and the hurt of what couldn't be for me. And I'm not OK right now. The truth is that my heart hurts and I'd really love to ask God why. Why the prayers answered differently than how I prayed, Lord? You too? Good, because the thing is there comes a time in all of our lives where we're not OK for whatever reason. We live in a sinful, fallen world and bad things happen. People sin, they get broken hearts, there is pain. And there comes a time when we fall apart a little bit. I've often wondered if I had to hide my pain and always cover it up with a smile and, "Everything has a purpose." Yes, everything does happen for a purpose. God works everything together for my good and His ultimate glory. God is good to me. But when I use those things as a cover up for my pain and I bury my pain under those things, in a way I'm actually dishonoring God. In the middle of my deepest hurt, when I can admit to myself and others that I am not OK, but even so God is faithful, I have the opportunity to bring Him the greatest glory. God is faithful in every moment. Even when I want to ask Him why, I know that He is good and His answer is good. But if I bury my pain, force a smile, and tell everyone I'm doing good, I'm not honoring Him in the way that I could. It's okay to drop the smile and admit that you're not doing good. It's okay to feel the pain. It's okay to cry. Yet even so, cling to Him through it. Even when it hurts praise Him. And wait for Him to show up. Because He always does, friend. He's going to show up, your morning is going to come, and someday it'll all be OK. But for now, it's okay to not be OK. He's holding you even then.
16 Comments
Bella Morganthal
11/17/2017 09:31:16 pm
Thank you, Rae! <3
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Bekah M.
11/17/2017 11:37:33 am
So encouraging! Thank for that, Bella :)
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Bella Morganthal
11/17/2017 09:31:40 pm
Thanks, Bekah <3
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Bella Morganthal
11/19/2017 06:47:59 pm
Thanks Grace!
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Anna P.
11/18/2017 06:06:18 pm
Bella, this post was wonderful and so encouraging! Thank you!
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Bella Morganthal
11/19/2017 06:55:25 pm
Thank you, sweet Anna! <3
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Bella Morganthal
11/19/2017 06:55:45 pm
My pleasure!
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Bella Morganthal
11/30/2017 12:43:06 am
Praise God! <3
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Bella Morganthal
11/30/2017 12:43:29 am
Thank you sweet friend! <3
Reply
Olivia Bell (aka Livy)
11/21/2017 09:32:43 pm
Once again, you did it Bella! You posted something that spoke right to me! Thank you so much for it, dear friend! I love you so much! :D
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Bella Morganthal
11/30/2017 12:43:55 am
Aww, I love YOU! so much <3
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