"So Jesus arose and followed him, and so did His disciples. And suddenly, a woman who had a flow of blood for twelve years came from behind and touched the hem of His garment. For she said to herself, 'If only I may touch His garment, I shall be made well.' But Jesus turned around, and when He saw her He said, 'Be of good cheer, daughter; your faith has made you well.' And the woman was made well from that hour." Matthew 9:19-22 Have you ever felt like God was not listening to your prayers? Have you ever wondered why you must suffer something, and pray for healing...only to keep suffering? I have. I have felt this way physically and emotionally. Last week I began a small "series" of posts on chronic illness and have a few more weeks of scheduled posts coming up. And so when I think about these questions, I had to share them with you. Because for the one battling chronic illness, I know that you can relate. It can be so hard to pray for a healing that doesn't come. Or to keep praying and keep suffering. I wonder if this woman in Matthew 9 felt the same. Her name isn't even listed and so I don't even know what to call her. But I can understand her suffering. For twelve years, this woman has suffered from a bleeding disorder. If you know anything about the culture of that day as well, a bleeding disorder would have made this woman "unclean," therefore she would have been an outcast in her society. Alone. Suffering. For twelve years. Can you imagine? In Mark 5, we're given even more information about her background and told that she had gone to many physicians, she had spent all the money she had trying to figure out the cause of her problem, and she did not get better. Mark 5:26 tells us that she was, in fact, getting worse. Surely she would've been praying. Surely she would've cried out to God for an answer. For some sort of relief. I imagine that every time she went to a new doctor, she prayed a prayer that sounded a little bit like, "Please, let me find answers here." But she didn't. Not for twelve years. Not one doctor made her better. Her suffering only grew worse. I understand. I have battled chronic migraines for as long as I can remember. Growing up, we tried everything to bring relief. My mom would spend hours in the grocery store finding foods that did not contain any "trigger" ingredients. She would spend hours researching vitamins or foods that should help with the headaches. I have spent so many hours praying for relief. Praying for a healing. And yet, at twenty-years-old, I still suffer. I still battle intense pain that leaves me exhausted and unable to do even simple tasks like laundry. That kind of thing can be just downright discouraging. I bet this woman had to be pretty discouraged. All those doctor visits? All those attempts at healing? Surely she must have felt like giving up. Yet Jesus was in town. I wonder if she left her house that day intending to find Jesus. Or if she just stumbled upon Him and the crowd. I wonder what miracles she had heard He had performed. I wonder what must have went through her mind and heart. Yet she pushed through the crowd to get to Jesus. And when she reaches for the corner of His robe, she is convinced that if she simply touches it, she will be healed. Her faith astounds me. After so much disappointment. After so many seemingly unanswered prayers. And she still had the courage to hope. To believe that Jesus still carried the answers she was looking for. Be of good cheer. Your faith has made you well. And just like that, she is healed. All of the searching. All of the waiting. After twelve years, the battle is over and she is healed. I don't know what your battle looks like. I don't know how long you have been fighting. I don't know how hard the fight has been. Maybe your health feels like an every day battle. Maybe a chronic illness has got you fighting for years and looking for so many answers, but you just can't seem to get better. Or maybe it's an emotional battle. Every day you fight for a healing of the heart and spirit. And yet the emotional pain you've been walking through is still there. Whatever your battle looks like, keep fighting. Don't give up hope in the darkest of places. Don't let the discouragement get the best of you. Keep hoping. Even when it hurts. Jesus is still the answer. Even if His healing doesn't come how you imagined. Even if His healing seems to take longer than twelve years. Keep hoping in Him. Never lose your faith.
Bekah M.
3/1/2018 12:45:25 am
This is super encouraging, Bella! Thank you❤
Bella Morganthal
3/5/2018 11:31:47 pm
Thank you so much for reading, Bekah <3 Thank you for your prayers! Praying for you and your mom too! I had never heard of that, but thank you for telling me, I am going to look into that :)
Bella Morganthal
3/5/2018 11:32:40 pm
Thank you, Grace! :) 3/3/2018 06:07:46 pm
This was beautiful, Bella. You inspire me every time taking what hurts you and using to to glorify God! Everything you said was so true, faith and prayer, they are so powerful and God is always with us! You really made the woman in the Bible account easier to understand too, so thank you! =)
Bella Morganthal
3/5/2018 11:33:41 pm
Aw, thank you, Liv <3 Your comments always make me smile! :)
Anna P.
3/5/2018 06:28:36 pm
Wow. This was very encouraging! Thank you for sharing this with us! I haven't suffered from chronic illness, but I am sure that it is NOT fun to have chronic migraines. I am so sorry! :( Yes!! I agree with Bekah! Past Tense essential oil has REALLY helped my mom who does get occasional migraines.
Bella Morganthal
3/5/2018 11:34:40 pm
Thank you so much, Anna, for your comment! <3 And thank you for that suggestion too, I'm going to check it out :)
Lori Ann
3/13/2018 03:35:33 pm
Hello there! I was introduced to your blog (specifically the 4 Things To Remember) post by a(n apparently mutual) friend. Read it yesterday just when it was much needed. Excited to see you're doing a series on chronic illness. Will there be a way to easily find and return to find all of those?
Bella Morganthal
3/19/2018 01:14:40 pm
Hi Lori Ann! Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and reading! I'm glad it was an encouragement for you. Comments are closed.
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