I have a confession to make. Are you ready? I am a little bit of a perfectionist. And my second confession? I am not perfect. In any way. At all. Ever. So why then do I waste so much of my time and energy on being “perfect” when it’s obviously something that I can’t attain? Why do I constantly hide behind a facade of perfectionism so that no one can ever really see the dark, totally imperfect parts of my life? Why do you carry your mask of perfectionism around with you? Because, please, I can’t really be the only one. I can’t really be the only one who would rather Instagram see my “spiritual” moments of coffee cup in hand and Bible on my lap than the not-so-spiritual moments when my hair is a mess and I’ve yelled at that certain family member more than once already and it’s only 9am. Maybe all of this is because sometimes...sometimes I can believe the stereotype that Christians are supposed to be perfect. Don’t believe me that this is a stereotype? Let’s be honest, if a Christian makes a big mistake, chances are people are going to make a bigger deal out of it than if that same mistake was committed by someone who did not call themselves a Christian. Why is this? If no one can be perfect, then why do we place such a higher standard on Christians? Why do I try so hard to hide behind my perfectionism façade? Maybe it’s because we’ve forgotten that Christians are forgiven because they are not perfect, not because they are perfect. Because I can promise you one hundred percent that Christians are not perfect and they’re not called to be perfect either. We're called to a holier way of living and a higher standard, yes. But perfection? Nope. So if we’re not called to be perfect, then what are we called to be? Christians are called to be authentic. (Matthew 15:7-9) When we get caught up in the idea that we are to be “perfect,” we end up being fake. Jesus talked a lot about fake Christianity. In the time that Jesus was living on the earth, there were people known as Pharisees. These people were kind of the religious leaders of that day. They made up a whole bunch of rules that people had to follow to be right with God. If anyone was seen as “perfect” during that time, these were the guys. Yet, Jesus comes along and He calls them hypocrites. Basically He’s saying they’re fakes. Frauds. Because on the outside they look shiny white and sparkling clean. They look “perfect.” But on the inside, Jesus knew that they were far from being perfect. Putting on a fake mask of “I’m better than you are” or “I’m perfect” only leaves us as frauds in the end. Instead, Christians are called to be real about their struggles. They’re called to be authentic to others about who they really are, and all their imperfections. Which means... Christians are called to be honest about their imperfections. (2 Corinthians 12:9) Let me be real with you for a second. Sometimes I can be afraid of showing my imperfections, because I’m afraid it’ll make me look weak. (Can someone say pride?) When Christians are honest and real about their imperfections and their shortcomings, they’re putting on display the whole point of the Gospel. Christ came because we were imperfect. Christ came because we were sinners who needed saving. Trying to act like we have it all together only dilutes the reality and the power of the Gospel. So I’ll be the first to put down my pride and wave my hands in the air declaring, “I’m not perfect. Far from it in fact. But in my weakness, He is strong. And that’s the whole point of the Gospel anyway.” Christians are called to imitate Christ. (Ephesians 5:1) While Christians can never reach perfection here, they are called to be more like Christ every day. Will this happen over night? Absolutely not. If it happened over night I wouldn’t have argued with my sister over doing dishes today. For the second time. (Or maybe third, but who’s counting?) Christians are going to fail. We’re going to mess up. We’re going to be imperfect. Our calling is to not stay in that place. We’re called to get up again and try better next time. We’re called with each choice we make to live a little bit more like Christ would. Only God is perfect. And as Christians who bear His name, we are challenged to imitate His perfect example a little more each day. Perfect Christianity is a myth. If perfect Christians existed, there would have been no need for a perfect Savior. If perfect Christianity existed, I sure would be in a whole lot of trouble. But praise God, I don’t have to be perfect because His perfection covers me. And each day, He is making me--and you--a little bit more into the person He wants us to be. This is a letter to the girl who thought her life would be a straight path from start to finish. To the girl who was so sure of what her future would have to hold. Who thought that if you made a plan and stuck to it that somehow life would follow that perfectly. The girl who believed that for something to be beautiful it had to go according to the plan she set for herself. This is a letter to the girl who was shook to the core when plans flipped upside down and life felt so different from what she imagined and it turned out to be nowhere near that ideal she imagined for herself of where she would be in five or ten years. For that girl was me. Dear younger me, You think that if you pray about something hard enough and you plan for something long enough that it’ll somehow all turn out exactly as you planned and hoped and dreamed. You believe that if you push towards your goals and hopes and plans with all of your heart that surely… surely they’ll all come to pass if you just work hard enough. You have put your trust in all of your plans and hopes because you somehow thought that life was in your control. Or maybe that’s what you hoped for, because sometimes it’s so much easier to try to control it all than surrender it all. You thought that if you started here and your goal was to end up there that somehow if you just kept walking towards that finish line, you’d get there without all the detours and interruptions that life is famous for. But life didn’t turn out like that five or ten year plan you always mapped out for yourself. It doesn’t turn out exactly that way for anyone. And somewhere along the way it all broke your heart. Maybe it was the moment when you felt you lost control of it all and you were scared to surrender it. Maybe it was the moment when things changed so much you weren’t sure you could handle your “new normal.” Or maybe it was the moment when you realized that life is more like a roller coaster than a straight path. But maybe most of all I think that what broke you the most was when you whispered, “How can life be beautiful here? In the middle of all the change and hurt and different and things I never wanted or hoped for. Surely life can’t be beautiful this way.” For that moment was when you believed a lie that could’ve held you back from all that your good God had planned for you. It was the moment you were almost content to lay down in the lie and stay there, allowing its destruction to harm you more. And if I could reach back and tell you one thing it would be this: Oh yes, brave soul, life can be so… so beautiful in the unknown or chaotic. God makes no mistakes. His plans might include a few bumps or twists and turns, but they’re going to turn out good in some way. His plans might hurt and ache and cause you to wonder when the tears will end, but He’s still good. And someday you’re going to realize something that will affect how you view the rest of life… Just as flowers and Christmas tree lights are both beautiful, they are oh, so different. Yet each one is beautiful in its own way. Your life is going to be oh, so different than you imagined or dreamed, but His plans for you? They’re beautiful. A different kind of beautiful than you maybe imagined, but beautiful just the same. For truly He makes everything beautiful in His time. Keep holding on to see it. He is worthy of your trust. |
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